SPOONIE WRITER: ACKNOWLEDGING THE BAD DAYS
I know it might seem like only the spoonies among the writing community have bad days, but all writers have them. I get that a lot of the time the spoonies are the ones having them more often than not, and while that's a part of being chronically ill and/or disabled, it's too easy to get lost in the thought of the bad days always outweighing the good and never getting anywhere.
I've been a published author for twenty years now. I've written nearly fifty books, and have released twenty-four of them (at least I will have tomorrow!) I have been disabled and chronically ill that whole time. While this is not some, hold me up as inspiration, speech, it is to show that you can get there, even if you have to take your time. There is no limit on publishing. There's no race, and you can take as long as you need. Of course I do get it's easier said than done, and I will admit to sometimes feeling like this journey and path is littered with obstacles that other, healthy and abled writers, don't have.
The key for me has been acknowledging that bad days will happen, like I said at the start, they do happen to everyone, and it's not a competition of who has it worse, at least not in my eyes. I am well aware of the hurdles in front of a lot of disabled and/or chronically ill writers. I've lived them to some degree, but that doesn't mean that all is lost.
People who have been following me for a while, or who have seen a blog post or two from me, will know that I am a big advocate for rest days, for taking your time, for doing what you need to stay moving. I will also admit to being a tad organised and having my writing and author journey planned as much as I'm able. It's one of the ways I deal with those bad days, acknowledging that they will happen, and while there are some things I can do to mitigate them, other times they come from nowhere and I need to pivot, adjust, and keep moving forward in other ways.
No, that's not me saying to push through. While there is a time and place for pushing yourself to a point, when it comes to bad days, that just leads to burnout or a flare, and no one wants that for you. I have found that it's a lot better to not hide from them. When making plans, acknowledge that you will pay for it afterwards, or will have a few bad days to follow, and adjust accordingly. That way you're not facing a deadline and realising that the staying up late to finish that book you're reading, is going to pay you back in full right when you need to be working.
That's not to say that I don't have mishaps. In September, I went to see my favourite band in concert. I worked the morning of because I knew that I would be up in the wee hours and napping and all before the concert itself. I also, somewhat, worked out that I would have a late night, but thought it would be fine. It was not fine. We had an amazing time, but didn't get home until almost 2am, and I'm normally awake and working at that point! Thankfully, I had a last minute, before the concert, moment, where I was like: wait, I am not going to be up to working tomorrow. I took the next day off and it's good that I did, because I was super tired and not capable of much of anything!
But that's what I mean, acknowledge those days will happen. It doesn't make it easy, it doesn't negate the disappointment, and the actual not feeling great, but, for me at least, it does ease the anxiety and the thought that I might be missing work and knocking my deadlines out of wack. It's not you, or me, failing, it's just the nature of the beast that is the chronically ill and disabled life.
So plan for them, and remember that this is not a race, you will get there, and we'll be cheering you on the whole time.
Any questions? Lemme know in the comments.
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