Why Self-Care Matters As A Writer - The Creative Process

 

WHY SELF-CARE MATTERS AS A WRITER

With it now being the second week of November and NaNoWriMo is now upon us, I wanted to talk today about why self-care matters, especially now because we're all working towards some massive goal that long term wise, isn't usually sustainable nor what the majority of participants are doing every month. Personally I am aiming for 24 chapters, and knowing that I will, most likely, hit that target at some point during the month of 50K words.

Let's talk a little about 2020, and why it's been a pretty tough year, I know people are sick of hearing that, but it's honestly the truth. We have the wildfires in Australia and the US, we have the global pandemic and the mess up of how certain governments are handling it, and we're, some of us anyway, still in lockdown. Here in the UK, the area that I live in is not yet in lockdown, but as someone who's extremely vulnerable to the virus, I'm planning to spend the next few months as we ride out the second wave, inside and only leaving for emergencies or things that can't be avoided, like Mepo and my port flush.

This wasn't a chance for me to whine at you, but to simply say that when you take NaNo AND 2020 and bundle them up together, it's no surprise that a lot of writers are gonna need some time to relax and recharged their creative well. And that's why I'm writing this piece because too many times you'll hear about writing every day during NaNo, about hitting that 1,667 words that you need to finish on time, and while it's a challenge and I might just not be taking it in the spirits it's intended, I did feel like I needed to make a post that talked about self-care and why it is so so very important to engage in some as both a creative person and a human.

I'm not going to give you ideas for self-care, everyone is different and as someone who wheels more than they walk, my version of what works for me won't necessarily be something most people are wanting or able to do. So no tips on the activity itself, but the reasons why you need to take a moment to breath and just allow some time for yourself to recharge.

#1 YOU ARE HUMAN
It took me a long time to get to the point [pause while Miss Tortellini chases her tail on my shoulder, it's cute!] Anyway, it took me a long time to get to the point where I understood self-care. It wasn't that I'm an idiot or that I didn't think I should, it was more than a lot of what people said about self-care was just the activities they engaged in and my first thought was: well I can't do that, so maybe it's not for me. So I'm telling you this so you know, it is for you! You find a way to recharge because all humans need a break and there's no shame in taking that break. Whatever that activity might be, it allows your brain to shut off from creating and recharge and no matter who you hard, you need that!

#2 BURNOUT IS REAL
I've talking about burnout recently (piece found here) and I'll be honest, last NaNo I went full hog and ended up writing 32 chapters and over 80K words, and I was really proud of myself, but then I got to December 1st and I knew I was on the path to burn out if I tried to do my usual (at the time) 24 chapters in a month. So I cut back, and have stayed, bar once in May and of course this November, at 20 chapters. I don't think I'll go back to 24 regularly because I find it easier to take time off, I spend less time anxious and worked up, and my chapters come to me with less stress, so why do that to myself?

If you don't take time off, you will burn yourself out. You don't have to do less like I do, but you do need to take those breaks so that you can be sure that you're gonna stay creative and get through your work at the speed you want.

And finally, #3 IT'S ACTUALLY FUN
Like I said above, it took my a long time to get to the point where I understood self-care. I thought it was doing certain activities as described by various people I didn't know. None of them were ones I either wanted to do, or could do, and so it felt like I wasn't ever going to get to the point where I was happy doing it. But when I had that lightbulb moment that I could do things that I chose for self-care, I found it to be a lot of fun. Like going for a wheel to the park (obviously not through COVID times) or playing a game on my phone, or chatting with a friend, or reading a book and all of that, these were things I enjoyed and would happily do.

So if you don't find it fun, maybe you haven't found the right activity for you, just keep trying new things, and allow yourself the room to breathe, relax and enjoy yourself!

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Review of He Called Me Beautiful by Annabeth Chatwin

  

Tyler: It’s 1998. Matthew Shepard was just murdered. I’m a skinny skater boy and low in the high school food chain already— no way am I coming out. But at a masked Halloween party, the cutest guy in school (and the only one who’s out) doesn’t recognize me. We dance together and he kisses me before I bolt. Now he’s desperate to discover who I am. If he does, he and his preppy friends hate me so much he’ll freak.

I want to tell him the truth, but I can’t.

★

Sutton: It’s 1998. Will & Grace is on TV, Ellen’s come out, and I’m the token gay prep everyone loves as long as I wear the right clothes and hate the right people. A mystery boy kisses me at my Halloween party, and I need to find him. My friends worry he might be a loser. I don’t care if he is. When I tell them that, they flip out… and suddenly the cool gay kid isn’t so cool anymore.

I have to find this guy, if only so I’m not alone.

Amazon

My Review: 5 STARS 

I picked this up because the blurb and titled called to me, the idea of a glimpse into the past with two young boys, both from different backgrounds falling in love. Sutton is out, Tyler isn’t, and the story just flowed on the page. I was rooting for them both, hoping that they’d find each other and end up living happily. The story was told beautifully, with just enough of that romantic suspense and tension, and I adored the characters and the story. A quick read, and one that I would recommend.

Join Joey here on the blog on Fridays for interviews, reviews and guest bloggers. If you'd be interested in doing any of those, you can contact Joey here.

 

5 Years Of #JoWriMoGo [CC]

  

Celebrating 5 years of my own personal hashtag #JoWriMoGo! #Authortube

PRE-ORDER CRAMPING CHRONICLES: THE FIRST TWINGE: http://www.books2read.com/TWINGE

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#TeaserTuesday

 

 Trying to help Meera is hard when she won't let Jessie help...

BUY HERE: http://www.books2read.com/TWINGE

[ID: A graphic with a red background and the header of Cramping Chronicles: The First Twinge and underneath the words: Coming October 13th 2020. The excerpt reads:

 
This had to be my worst idea ever. Yes, I needed to keep working on a way to solve Meera's family problems, that wasn't the bad idea. The bad idea had been listening to Gray, and not thinking more about how to approach the subject. Now I stood the chance of losing the only two friends I had at this school, along with having to put up with Miss Trigger Point.

 
At the bottom is Joey Paul, her website of www.joeypaulonline.com and the logo of a green and purple bug in the far right corner.

END ID]

 

The Trials Of An Indie Author: Taking Care Of Yourself

 

 THE TRIALS OF AN INDIE AUTHOR: TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF

Last week I did a piece about deadlines and being a spoonie writer (found here), and a lot of it was about self-care when it comes to dealing with a deadline and trying not to freak out. This week I thought that it would be a good idea to kinda continue that idea, but have the scope be as an indie author. For those not aware, I've been published for 15 years as an indie author, I have several chronic conditions and am disabled, a full-time wheelchair user, and also need supplemental oxygen. Oh, and I've published 18 books! So I feel like when it comes to this topic, I'm a little bit of an expert, maybe not expert, I hesitate to call myself an expert at anything, but let's say that I have a lot of experience in the area.

When I talk about self-care, I have to admit that I wasn't, in the start of my career, any good at it. I pushed myself to breaking point time and time again, and got the point where I just didn't want to write, didn't want to publish, was just sick to death of the whole thing. It took me a long time to come back from that, to be at a point where I could finally enjoy writing and wanted to do it again.

I've talked a little bit about burnout before (piece found here), but what I wanted to do today is not just educate you on it, but also show you ways that you can take care of yourself, because as an indie author, usually, you're wearing a lot of hats. You're the big boss, the one in charge, and everyone that works with you and for you is looking to you to pay them, instruct them, and make sure the whole process works smoothly. And sometimes that's a lot of pressure to have on any one person.

So self-care can take many different forms. I use chatting with friends, or reading a book or two, or even playing games on my phone. In times when there's not a plague outside, I'll go out for a wheel, or hunt for a geocache or two. It's all such a subjective personal thing that someone telling you what they do for self-care and how you should do the exact same thing is only going to lead to frustration.

For example, I find it hard to binge a Netflix show because usually when I'm at my lowest energy wise, I can't concentrate enough to follow along with it. Does that mean it's not a self-care for me at other times? No, I do binge from time to time, but it's not my go-to. Yoga, long walks, all of those forms of exercise are also something I just can't do. The majority of the time I'm unable to walk more than a few steps, so trying out running or yoga is just not gonna cut it for me.

But you do need to find something that works for you, something that helps lessen your load, and helps you start to chill out and come down from all the stress on you shoulders. With NaNoWriMo upon us, we all need to remember that the most important thing of all of this, is to breathe, take a moment, and make sure you don't end up burning out. The last thing you want is to push yourself so hard that by the time December comes, you're a husk of who you normally are, and you don't want to even look at what you wrote during NaNo.

So breathe, take a moment, and look after you, that's the important thing to remember. And if you have any self-care go tos, lemme know in the comments!

Follow Joey here on her blog, or on Facebook or Tumblr to be kept up to date with the latest news regarding Joey and her books

Review of Twisted By Time by R.L Perez

A fall through time. A reckless witch. A war of monsters.

17-year-old witch Desiree Campbell tries to cast a spell to go to Miami for spring break.

But she ends up in Cuba a hundred years in the past.

The year is 1898. The Spanish-American War rages. Demons thrive in the city, preying on humans. Desi is caught between the war of mortals and the war of monsters.

She meets Oliver Gerrick, a handsome American soldier and warlock. He offers to help her fight off demons and find a way home.

But the path to returning back to her own time won't be easy. Demons attack, hungry for blood. And Desi suddenly finds herself targeted by a powerful demon lord.

He knows she's time-traveled. And he wants to keep her trapped in 1898 forever.

Amazon

My Review: 5 STARS

I picked this up because the blurb and cover called to me, and I was desperate to start it the day it was released. A witch who has no plans on doing anything with her life but ballet, ignoring everything to do with her witch heritage ends up making a mistake with a spell, and trapped in the past in the middle of a war. I adored Desi from the first few chapters, and as the story went on, I was hungry for more. The characters were all well rounded and engaging and the story fast paced and leaving you desperate to know what happens. I will be looking for more by this author, and reading more in this series when they come out. Overall, a great read and one I recommend!

Join Joey here on the blog on Fridays for interviews, reviews and guest bloggers. If you'd be interested in doing any of those, you can contact Joey here.

A Week In The Life Of An Author: September 2020 [CC]

 

A week in the life of an indie author with kittens, revisions, drafting, and more! #Authortube

PRE-ORDER CRAMPING CHRONICLES: THE FIRST TWINGE: http://www.books2read.com/TWINGE

BUY MY BOOKS: http://www.joeypaulonline.com/p/aboutjoeys-books.html
BLOG: http://www.joeypaulonline.com/
TUMBLR: http://authorjoeypaul.tumblr.com
FACEBOOK: http://facebook.com/JoeyPaulOnline
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#TeaserTuesday

 

Making friends is coming a little easier for Jessie than she expected it would be...

BUY HERE: http://www.books2read.com/TWINGE

[ID: A graphic with a red background and the header of Cramping Chronicles: The First Twinge and underneath the words: Coming October 13th 2020. The excerpt reads:

 
“Rowena,” she said, with a small smile. She spoke quietly still, and that made me think she wasn't usually someone who approached a stranger. “Where do you want the table?”
“Along the back row would be awesome, thanks,” I said.
She moved the table with ease, making sure to line it up with the others. “That okay?” she asked, stepping back.
“That's perfect, thanks.”

 
At the bottom is Joey Paul, her website of www.joeypaulonline.com and the logo of a green and purple bug in the far right corner.

END ID]

 

Spoonie Writer: Keeping On Deadlines

 

 SPOONIE WRITER: KEEPING ON DEADLINES

I've spoken before about how deadlines are hard for most writers, but especially so for those of us who are also spoonies. One of the reasons I stuck on the indie path for publishing was that the majority of my deadlines would be ones I've set for myself and could therefore change. It's not always the case, when I have other people working for me, editors and the like, I can't miss those deadlines. And while it adds to my stress levels, it's also a small thing for me. My editors are all people I really like and get on well with, so they get when things are just not going to happen, and the same is true for me with them.

That said, there are times when you can't miss a deadline, and while I'm a spoonie writer who's on the indie path, I know there are other spoonie writers who will go the traditional route, and will have deadlines that they have no control over. This piece isn't just for them, some of these tips and such have worked for me when it comes to meeting those editing deadline, along with the ones that can't be moved because of other restrictions on me.

So how do I cope with deadlines? How do I plan my time? You all know that I am an extensive planner when it comes to my to-do list, but part of that plays into how I cope with deadlines when I'm already struggling with my health. I'm going to give you some of my tips, and hope that they can help you too.

#1 PLAN FOR SICK DAYS
This is true for anyone planning, but especially true for spoonies. We are going to have good days when we get everything on our to-do list done, and we are going to have bad days when nothing seems to be going right, and we're just physically, mentally unable to do the work needed. So if you plan to have days off, days when you won't work, then you can move those days around as needed. It means that if a flare hits on a day that's not planned as a day off, you take the day off, have it then, and start work when you're able, either the following day or when you're next able.

#2 DON'T OVERLOAD YOURSELF
This is a tip that really kinda only applies to indie authors, but it can apply to traditional depending on your circumstances. As I said above, I have the choice to where I put my deadlines. If it's revising, then I have the choice to make it this month or that. I know what I'm capable of doing in a month, so I know that if I set myself the whole draft to be done in a week, it's just not going to happen, and if I attempt to do it, I will burn out, or flare, and that's just gonna bite me in the backside.

So if you know that you can only manage a certain amount of work in one day, then make sure you don't go above that, make sure you set your schedule for the minimum you can manage, not the max, because even if it's not a day that you physically or mentally can't work, it might be a day that isn't you at your best, and pushing yourself is only going to make you feel worse.

#3 COMMUNICATE WITH OTHERS
This is more of a tip for traditional authors, though indies will have this too. If you're struggling to meet your deadline, talk to your agent, they should be able to help. If you're indie and you have a deadline for an editor, talk to them, explain the situation. They might have to move you back, but it's also not worth making yourself horribly ill because of it. You are human, you need breaks, you need rest, and that's okay.

#4 START WITH SMALL TASKS ON MIDDLE DAYS
By middle days I simply mean those days when you're not unable to work, but you're also not at your best. Small tasks, like writing a blog post, or recording a video, or making an instagram story. Little admin tasks that will feel productive, but also won't push you to the brink. If you need to write, then start with a lower word count/page count/whatever to make sure that you are gentle with yourself and don't push through to a flare the next day.

And finally, #5 BE GENTLE WITH YOURSELF
Deadlines aren't easy for the majority of people, there's so much that goes into writing, marketing and publishing a book that you're going to find that there are days when you just can't, and you need a break. Reach out to friends, have some down time, reward yourself when you hit milestones, and accept that you are human and it's okay if things get too hard or you miss a deadline. You are more important than that, and you need to be gentle with yourself both physically and mentally.#

Do you have any tips for helping with deadlines? If you do, lemme know in the comments!

Follow Joey here on her blog, or on Facebook or Tumblr to be kept up to date with the latest news regarding Joey and her books

Review of The Last Summer by Cait Marie

For the first eleven years of their lives, neighbors Lila and Gavin were inseparable best friends. They did everything together. Until they didn't.

Every detail of Lila's life has been meticulously planned out since she was a child. To the point where she forgot one vital thing: to live. When she receives news that drastically alters the path of her future, she realizes she has one last chance to create memories and make the most of her summer.

Gavin, on the other hand, is known for his carefree attitude. He has lived a charmed life for almost eighteen years. He's never short on friends or a good time, he has a supportive family, and he's all set to go off to college and follow his dreams. The one thing he doesn't have is the girl.

He doesn't know why Lila pushed him away all those years ago, but when Gavin finds her summer bucket list, he's determined to help his goody-two-shoes neighbor cross off every item and hopefully mend their friendship in the process. Even if that's not all he wants from her.

He just hopes it's not too late.

Amazon

My Review: 5 STARS

I picked this up because of the blurb and hoped for a good romance and I was not disappointed. I loved Lila, and Gavin and I adored the story, it pulled at the heart strings, and had me sold on them both as a couple from the first few pages. I loved the bucket list, loved watching them cross things off, and loved watching them get closer and closer! The story was super romantic, light but with some serious moments, and I would recommend it to anyone who loves a good teen romance. Highly enjoyable!

Join Joey here on the blog on Fridays for interviews, reviews and guest bloggers. If you'd be interested in doing any of those, you can contact Joey here.