Spoonie Writer: Working On Bad Days

SPOONIE WRITER: WORKING ON BAD DAYS

I've always been a big proponent for not pushing yourself to breaking point, to taking breaks when you need them, to making sure you don't fall into that trap of thinking you have to earn your rest days. I fully believe in that, and yet I still get asked sometimes why I work on days when I have pain, or more fatigue. I've tried to explain that part of my conditions and disability is that these are symptoms that never go away, but for some people, they don't really get that, and I thought that today I would touch on why I work on what other people see as 'bad' days.

For those new to me, I've been an indie author for almost 20 years. I'm 43 and chronically ill and disabled with a fair few conditions, two of which are Fibromylagia and M.E. These are, usually, the big ones that impact my ability to work both a conventional job and sometimes when I'm writing too. I try to work when I can, but my work day is, at most 3 hours. The rest of the time, I'm in bed resting, napping, medicating, or just trying to have some kind of function. 

I know that the thought of being in constant severe pain can be a little hard for some people to imagine, or process, but if I didn't work when I had pain, I would never work. I would never get anything done. The point I'm making is not to tout myself as better or that anyone else with my conditions should be doing the same, but to just make it clear that what a healthy person would consider a bad day, I see as normal. 

Before you jump in with how inspirational I am, remember that I've been sick for over half my life. I have lived with this pain in varying degrees the majority of my life. My lungs have been bad all of my life. My mobility has been impacted for over 25 years. I've been in a wheelchair for about the same amount of time, full time for the past 15 or so. Again, this is not about making out how super amazing I am, but to point out one thing that a lot of people forget, you do adapt. Everyone does it. Whether it's adapting to a new house or a new job, or a new sleep schedule, we all adapt, and the same can be said for those of us with chronic conditions.

While not everyone can adapt to the same level, I've been able to do so, and I've also found ways, cheat codes if you will, in my years of being an author. I've known how much I can push myself, and trust me I've also gone too far and paid for it, which is why I'm so big on people having down time. I know how much I can manage, and because I track my time, I know how long a certain task will usually take me. I've got all this lived experience that I'm able to tell when and how I'll be able to get things done, and also when I won't.

There are times when I have to take time off, unplanned time off. Recently I've been going through the process of diagnosing a possible new condition, and that has caused hospital stays and time at home when things are just not good. I've taken that time off because I'm not someone who is going to work no matter what. All that does is make a mess of my body, my health, and it also produces work that I have to go back and fix in a big way. So even though I normally have at least two days off each month, some months it's more because of health blips. And that's okay. I didn't have to earn them, I needed them and I took them.

Too much of the time, with hustle culture and all that goes with that, people are expected to turn up to work and do whatever they can to push through. That's not healthy, it's not sustainable, and it's actively harmful to the people involved. So what do I think about working on bad days? No, rest, take the time you need, and take care of you.

Anyone saying otherwise does not have your best interests at heart. Take care of you, you are important and need rest.

Any questions? Lemme know in the comments! 

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